Since this was my first baby I did not expect the birth to
be easy, or on time. So at ten days past my due date I had
a Membrane Sweep and I was told that I was 2cm dilated. That
thrilled me but still I did not expect the procedure to be
a success because it was so simple (I could probably have
done it myself)! By the twelfth day past my due date and my
experimenting with every trick in the book for bringing labour
on I could not sleep for contractions. They were really only
like period pains but at ten minutes apart I just could not
sleep. These sorts of pains went on for eleven hours so after
lots of 'am I, aren't I?' deliberations I accepted that it
must be early labour but they were only ever like my (bad)
period pains. I called the evening shift midwife after twelve
hours of pains to let her know that she would not be getting
any sleep that night. She decided to come round to our house
to examine me. I was very upset to find that after twelve
hours (albeit, mild) I was still only 2-3cm. Contractions
were starting to steady me up though so it is from there that
they counted my labour as having officially begun.
I lasted another six hours at home before we arranged to
meet the midwife at the hospital. I had had two baths at home
to deal with the pain and they had been great, helped by Brendan
feeding me strawberries and ice-cream I am sure! The midwife
had recommended the baths with Brendan poring water on my
bump during each contraction. When we arrived at the hospital
I was booked into a lovely Home From Home room while I waited
for the birthing pool to become free. Entonox made a huge
difference at that stage although it took me a while to overcome
the initial sickly feelings and intensely dry throat that
it caused. I drank a lot of water to counteract it. At 4am
(almost three hours after arriving at the hospital) I got
into the pool, which was heaven. I could only have Entonox
in the birthing pool though and by about 6am I knew it would
probably not be enough. I had to get out of the pool for an
examination and was horrified when I was told that I was only
3cm dilated. Both of the midwives who had examined me had
struggled to decide on the position of the baby - her back
was lying down my right side. They explained that contractions
start from the top of your uterus but in my case they were
not pushing on anything because Morwenna was down my side.
My cervix just wasn't dilating because she was not putting
pressure on it. They broke my waters to try and help, which
did make contractions a little more severe.
At 7am the next midwife came on duty and she re-examined
me. I was still only 3-4cm and in absolute agony. Brendan
now tells me that I was green and looked very ill! I felt
like I was having out of body experiences - everything being
said was incoherent and I was very much on another planet.
It was not so much the pain as how long it had been going
on. We had had dinner at 6pm the night before and that lack
of recent food combined with no sleep was really wearing me
out. I begged for an epidural having wanted nothing more than
the pool and Entonox.
By 9am I had the epidural in place and to my amazement there
was absolutely no pain having it put in and yet that had caused
my fear of them. The worst bit was having the drip put in
as my arm bled a lot. I also had to be monitored with straps
around my middle because of the possible effects of the epidural
on a foetus. By that point I did not care because I was feeling
nothing whereas in planning a reasonably active labour I know
I could not afford to be 'strapped down'.
Things were good for a while but by midday I was still only
5-6cm which was hard to deal with. My notes are littered with
'slow progress' comments, which has all been blamed on Morwenna's
lie. At this point they saw meconium in my waters and everyone
got nervous. They then assume that the baby has inhaled it
so a paediatrician has to be present at delivery to resuscitate
the baby and suck out any other fluids around the nose and
ears. My contractions started to get weaker and Morwenna's
heart baserate increased. Oxytocin was added to my drip which
was meant to effectively induce me - another 'no no' in my
birth plan! Amazingly this actually slowed things down!!!
My contractions were much weaker and further apart. Morwenna
began to decline, not recovering properly from the few contractions
I was having so numerous members of staff of all levels were
called in for their opinion. The two obstetricians wanted
to take some of her blood to check on her oxygen levels. They
could only do that by holding my (dead) leg in the air, prizing
me open with a speculum and cutting her scalp to take a sample.
I was mortified. They did that at 1.05pm and I could have
cried for her. I was still only 6cm. Twenty minutes later
the senior obstetrician was explaining that he would take
another blood sample from her in ten minutes. From the graphs
that the monitor was producing he thought she was deteriorating
even more and expected her oxygen levels to have been reduced.
If that was shown to be the case after another blood sample
was taken then he wanted to do a caesarean section. I had
not minded the thought of that in the last couple of weeks
when desperate for the pregnancy to be over and to meet our
baby, but faced with that prospect and just half an hour to
deal with it I began to cry
for her. Ten minutes later
my leg was in the air again when it was announced that I was
10cm!!! Nobody could believe it. I told the senior obstetrician
to eat his words since he had just called my induced contractions
pathetic after looking at the graph! This meant that they
could get the head through my cervix but there was not time
to do it naturally because of her state. They brought the
stirrups and forceps in and I started to whinge about the
necessary episiotomy. My birth plan had requested I be left
to tear rather than be cut!
At 2.39pm she was born after two contractions, but my god,
he looked like he was dragging in a trawler net! Brendan felt
bad with the way they were pulling at her so he had to edge
a little closer to my head end! When her head was out they
found another problem - the cord was round her neck. They
tried to lift it over her head but to no avail. It was clamped
and cut there and then though we had hoped that Brendan would
be able to cut it. She emerged with another half a contraction
and was whisked to the paediatrician for resuscitation after
we had been shown 'what' she was! They spent a couple of minutes
'bringing her back' which had me in tears, not least because
it seemed like an eternity. I was stitched up (but new nothing
of it) and she was given to us. I fed her about half and hour
later and she got the hang of it instantly. Something was
finally going right!
I had to stay in hospital for 24 hours because of the meconium
that she had inhaled. They were checking her temperature,
heart rate and breathing every four hours but she was fine
from the beginning. We both slept really well, although I
did not get enough for worrying about her! She went eleven
hours without a feed which terrified me but I was rightly
told that she had probably been through more than me and was
at least as exhausted as I was.
My labour was hell. Everything I did not want, I ended up
with! I was not disappointed because in the end I felt none
of the later contractions because the epidural was so fantastic.
The episiotomy was only skin deep and 2-3 cm so that had not
caused too much trouble either. The only complaint I had for
a few days afterwards was tiredness and period-type pains,
mostly due to the contractions caused by breast feeding. Through
the labour I went twenty-four hours without food since nobody
had told me that you cannot eat on an epidural. I was sick
a few times when the Entonox got too much and with the Syntocinon
that helps to deliver the placenta quickly. That did not help
my stomach's state.
Morwenna is lovely but I felt so guilty about her bruising
and cuts from the blood samples and forceps. She was very
small although 7lb 1.5oz does not sound small. She has enormous
fingers so will hopefully be following in her musician mother's
footsteps! She really perked up after she had slept a bit
and was feeding well and regularly.
I am surprised that I am not bitter about not having a waterbirth
but at the same time I know I would never have coped with
what I went through without the epidural. I do feel a little
cheated by not feeling her delivery - it is slightly harder
to accept that I gave birth to her but I adored her from the
onset so it cannot be detrimental! I strongly advise people
to keep an open mind about their birth plans, and I thoroughly
recommend epidurals if you have had something to eat!
A very long and hard labour indeed. I didn't think it would
ever end. And when the baby was finally delivered it brought
a surprise of its own - a little girl; nobody expected that!
We felt sure we had seen evidence to the contrary at a twenty-two
week scan!
Life is turned upside-down in the first few weeks. Your body
clock might as well be running backwards so you just have
to grab sleep when you can. Morwenna acts as the committee
that we have to go through before making any decisions. We
might have an idea of what time we want to do something of
go somewhere, but if she decides she is hungry just before
then we have half-an-hour of feeding, half-an-hour of burping
and a nappy change to negotiate before we stand a chance of
leaving. EVERYTHING becomes baby-centred!
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